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A Shot ? of Confidence ? Episode 1⃣
How To Stay Positive
Today we are talking about how to stay positive
Take that look off your face
Right now you’re probably thinking this is about meditating
It’s not.
Even though meditating is awesome
Especially the let’s keep it CS Honest Meditation* I created (*shameless plug) which is coming soon
So here’s the thing…
Negative shiz happens
It does.
There is no denying it.
In fact to deny our negative emotions, to not acknowledge negative emotions, is actually bad for your well-being!
Research has shown we need negative emotions in our life and we shouldn’t just be using self-affirmations (more on that a little later)
Appropriate negativity is essential when it comes to staying positive
Negative emotions offer us feedback on our performance, gives us hints on what’s working and what’s not so we can navigate our behaviour and learn ways to improve
[bctt tweet=”Everything negative – pressure, challenges – is all an opportunity for me to rise. Kobe Bryant ” username=”confidentsch”]
Dishwashing gives immediate results ? Your business & your life changes take time. ⏰ So give yourself permission to get results that aren’t immediate.? ? Because you’re doing something much greater than washing dishes ?
So how do you stay positive when your business isn’t generating the revenue even though you set targets?
How do you stay positive when people are not watching your live streams and they are not converting?
How do you stay positive when you don’t feel like getting out of bed?
How do you stay positive to sell with confidence?
Well, you don’t just use positive affirmations!
Instead, we use afformations
Yes I spelled it right AFFORMATIONS!
Afformations are a way for you to ask questions that go from “I will” to “will I”
For example instead of I will close this lead. You instead ask, will I close this lead? Then the mind finds all the reasons, all the evidence as to why you will, it’s just one of the activities I teach in FREE 4 Ways to Get Sales Faster video series I created
And in my main program 90 Days To Sales Mastery, we actually create those powerful afformations together
You Need The Right Positivity To Stay Positive
So how do you know if you have the right negative to positive ratios so you know you have just the right amount to stay positive?
Well I am glad you asked friend
The exact ratio is 3:1
For every three instances of feeling gratitude and one instance of anger, guilt or embarrassment people generally flourished.
But let’s go even deeper here:
Negative emotions are unintentional
Often hidden
Overflowing like a wave of doubt
While positive emotions are much more deliberate, intentional making it seem like we have to be in a reflective state to actually tap into it
So what does that mean?
It means in order to say positive we must be obsessed with balancing the 3:1 ratio
Ask yourself a few questions so you stay on track to stay positive
Do you give up too easily?
Are you learning self-helplessness and sometimes explain things as permanent, universal or personal (see PUP technique in video above)?
There are a bunch of other questions that are essential to staying positive.
But Ruth-Ellen how do you know how to respond to make sure you stay positive?
Ahha, that is where the video comes in my friend (go watch it already) it has the type of responses that you may have come up with.
Ruth-Ellen
You’ve Got The Gear, Now Get In The Game ?
Ruth-Ellen – Your Get More Sales Coach
P.S. Have you scheduled that 90 Days To Sales Mastery Q & A call yet?
Are you’re tired of constantly missing your monthly income goals?
Visualizing success but never quite hitting your own target?
Bored of living a life that isn’t living up to your expectations?
If you ever find yourself, overwhelmed, stressed or frustrated and you want to stop feeling jealous when you see other people smashing it wondering why it hasn’t happened for you even if you are more talented than them; then you need to book a call to explore more about this 90-day program
Book your slot in the calendar now
Why You Need To Stop With The Crappy Affirmations
Do you ever wish you could change your mindset to achieve your goals? Good news: you can, by using affirmations and afformations. Affirmations are powerful statements that help improve your mindset, while afformations take it a step further by turning these statements into questions. Ready to unlock your potential and create affirmations that actually work? Keep reading to learn the best techniques for crafting effective affirmations and how to enhance them with afformations.
What are affirmations and why do they matter?
Definition of affirmations
Affirmations are positive statements that you repeat to yourself, with the goal of replacing negative or limiting beliefs with empowering ones. These statements can be about anything, from your self-worth to your career goals. They are typically short and easy to remember, and are often written in the present tense.
Importance of affirmations
Affirmations can be a powerful tool for personal growth and transformation. By repeating positive statements to yourself on a regular basis, you can begin to change the way you think and feel about yourself, your life and the world around you. This can lead to increased confidence, motivation, and a more positive outlook on life.
Common issues with affirmations
While affirmations can be a powerful tool for personal transformation, there are some common issues that people may encounter when trying to use them effectively. One of the biggest issues is that people may not believe the affirmations they are repeating, which can make them feel like a waste of time. Another issue is that people may not be using the right affirmations for their specific needs or goals.
To overcome these issues, it’s important to choose affirmations that are specific, realistic, and meaningful to you. It’s also important to repeat your affirmations regularly, and to use them in conjunction with other personal growth practices, such as meditation or journaling.
What Are Afformations?
Do you ever find yourself struggling to believe the affirmations you repeat to yourself? If so, you may want to try using afformations instead.
Definition of Afformations
Afformations are a type of self-talk that involves asking yourself empowering questions. Unlike affirmations, which are statements that you repeat to yourself, afformations are phrased as questions that prompt your brain to search for evidence to support the positive assumption being made.
For example, instead of saying “I am confident”, an afformation would be “Why am I so confident?” This prompts your brain to search for evidence to support your confidence, rather than feeling like you are lying to yourself with a statement that you don’t believe.
How Afformations Differ from Affirmations
The main difference between afformations and affirmations is the way they are phrased. Affirmations are statements that are repeated to yourself, often in the present tense, with the goal of replacing negative self-talk with positive self-talk.
Afformations, on the other hand, are phrased as questions that prompt your brain to search for evidence to support the positive assumption being made. This can be especially helpful for people who struggle with feeling like affirmations are not believable or effective.
With afformations, you are essentially programming your brain to look for evidence that supports the positive beliefs you want to have about yourself, rather than simply telling yourself something that you may not believe to be true.
You may have heard of affirmations, but have you heard of afformations? Afformations are similar to affirmations in that they are positive statements you repeat to yourself to change your mindset and attract positive outcomes. However, what sets afformations apart is that they are framed as a question. This creates a more powerful effect on your subconscious mind, as it is more likely to seek out solutions and answers to a question than a statement.
1. Identify the Problem
The first step in creating effective afformations is to identify the problem you want to solve. What is holding you back? What negative thought patterns do you have? Once you have identified the problem, write it down.
2. Frame the Problem as a Question
Next, turn the problem into a question. For example, if your problem is “I am not confident,” rephrase it as “Why am I so confident?” This turns the focus onto finding a solution rather than dwelling on the problem.
3. Add Empowering Phrases
Now it’s time to add empowering phrases to your afformation. These are positive statements that will help you believe in yourself and your ability to find a solution. For example, you could add “I am capable” or “I am worthy” to your afformation.
4. Use Present Tense and Positive Language
Make sure to use present tense and positive language in your afformations. This helps to reprogram your subconscious mind and create a more positive outlook. For example, instead of saying “I will be confident,” say “I am confident.”
5. Keep It Short and Specific
Keep your afformation short and specific. This makes it easier to remember and repeat throughout the day. For example, “Why am I so confident when speaking in public?”
6. Repeat Your Afformations Regularly
Finally, repeat your afformations regularly. Set aside time each day to say them out loud or write them down. The more you repeat them, the more they will become ingrained in your subconscious mind.
By following these steps, you can create effective afformations that will help you overcome negative thought patterns and attract positive outcomes.
Examples of Afformations
Creating affirmations that work can be challenging, but afformations are a powerful tool that can help you shift your mindset and achieve your goals. Here are some examples of afformations that you can use to improve your health, wealth, relationships, and career.
Health Afformations
- Why am I so healthy?
- How did I become so fit and strong?
- Why do I love eating healthy foods?
Health afformations can help you focus on your well-being and make positive changes to your lifestyle. By asking why and how questions, you can encourage your mind to find solutions and create a healthier version of yourself.
Wealth Afformations
- Why am I so successful?
- How did I become so wealthy?
- Why do I attract abundance and prosperity?
Wealth afformations can help you improve your financial situation and attract more money into your life. By asking why and how questions, you can focus on the positive aspects of your financial situation and create a mindset of abundance and prosperity.
Relationship Afformations
- Why am I so loved and appreciated?
- How did I become so happy in my relationships?
- Why do I attract supportive and loving people?
Relationship afformations can help you improve your connections with others and attract positive people into your life. By asking why and how questions, you can focus on the positive aspects of your relationships and create a mindset of love and appreciation.
Career Afformations
- Why am I so successful in my career?
- How did I become so confident in my skills?
- Why do I attract fulfilling and rewarding opportunities?
Career afformations can help you improve your professional life and achieve your career goals. By asking why and how questions, you can focus on the positive aspects of your career and create a mindset of success and achievement.
Reasons Afformations Don’t Work
You may have heard of affirmations as a way to improve your mindset and achieve your goals. But have you heard of afformations? Afformations are a newer approach to self-improvement that involve asking yourself empowering questions instead of making positive statements. While many people have found success with afformations, there are also some reasons why they may not work for everyone.
1. You’re Not Asking the Right Questions
One of the key aspects of afformations is asking yourself empowering questions that focus on what you want to achieve. However, if you’re not asking the right questions, you may not see the results you want. For example, if you’re trying to lose weight, asking yourself “Why am I always so hungry?” may not be as effective as asking “Why do I make healthy choices for my body?”
2. You’re Not Using Them Consistently
Like any habit or practice, afformations require consistency in order to see results. If you only use them sporadically or forget to incorporate them into your daily routine, you may not see the same benefits as someone who uses them consistently. Make sure to set aside time each day to use afformations and make them a regular part of your routine.
3. You’re Not Believing in Yourself
Afformations are all about empowering yourself and believing that you can achieve your goals. If you don’t truly believe in yourself or your ability to achieve what you want, afformations may not work as well. It’s important to work on building your self-confidence and belief in yourself in order to see the full benefits of afformations.
4. You’re Not Taking Action
While afformations can be powerful in helping you shift your mindset and beliefs, they’re not a substitute for taking action towards your goals. If you’re not taking tangible steps towards what you want to achieve, afformations may not be as effective. Make sure to combine afformations with action in order to see the best results.
Creating affirmations that work for you can be a powerful tool in achieving your goals and improving your mindset. When you combine this using the technique of “afformations”, you can shift your focus from negative self-talk to positive self-talk and reprogram your subconscious mind. Remember to make your afformations specific, positive, and in the present tense to align your thoughts with your desired outcome. Additionally, using visualization and repetition can help to reinforce your affirmations and make them more effective. With practice and consistency, you can create afformations that will support you in becoming the best version of yourself. So go ahead, give it a try, and see the positive changes that will come your way!
Are You Choosing Fear Or Love?
You don’t understand is what I a workshop participant said to me.
I was teaching how to Rock, dominate and get promoted and I kept on hearing excuses.
My company doesn’t work that way – ‘the you don’t understand excuse’
My manager and I already had that discussion – ‘the I am already doing it excuse’
Oh, I understand.
I understand excuses
Excuses born out of fear
I understand that you may know what to do, but you ain’t doing it
Often time we pull back from opportunities
Pull back from relationships instead of telling the truth
The truth to ourselves
Our jobs as leaders, as people who fully show up, is not to convince the people that are not in it to win it.
Our job is to be present
Show up fully
Without apologies
Go through each doorway with a fresh new attitude of gratitude so we can see the altitude we want in ALL areas of our lives.
To fulfil the vision
I was in Jenny Kovacs challenge about ask and receive and something dawned on me
Everything I was doing right now was in alignment with my vision
And if you don’t know my vision here is a little bit of it
**************************
We just bought a property in Chistlehusrt and it felt wonderful to pay for it in cash, with the portfolio interest gained from various investments we were able to pay off my mums and sister mortgage and renovate my dad house as well as pay for an assistant to help him.
My hubby and I volunteered at Crisis together for the second year running
We opened our second digital training hub in London which was subsidised by the state and corporates to employ the next generation of Google entrepreneurs
My husband proposes every day to me and I always accept he is the most amazing man I know, he inspires me and the kids and is the most loving, giving, humble, handsome, man I know and
I thank God for him every day.
*************************
Nothing in my vision is actually about money
It’s about who I am already, but enhancing it.
I volunteer at Crisis, the awesome homeless shelter at Christmas because I know from personal experience how lonely homelessness is.
My vision is about an experience
How I want to leave the world a better place
How I want to make sure I am a contributor, not just a consumer
How I want to be love and be loved (sidenote: I am getting a tattoo that says live to love)
The things I can do to be open to it every day is to stop being cynical, be focused on my vision and believe that the universe has got my back. This desire to desire that God has placed in my heart will come to fruition.
Fear or love can also be seen in other areas of our life. We have to be intentional because when we put ourselves out there to the world of the potential suitors we need to set clear intentions
Consciously and literally
I am dating with the intention of meeting the right guy, the more dates you go on the closer you get to the right guy.
I am on POF,
Tinder (yes Tinder lol)
Even accepted a request from a random guy on Facebook (I don’t just add random people, I checked out his profile).
However, I set boundaries and similar to considering working with a potential client, if they are flakey I don’t give second chances. Here’s my thinking, if you can’t be trusted with the small things like showing up, how can you be trusted with the big things?
When people show you who they are, believe them ?
But make your choice from love, not fear, because the other option is not really an option at all
Ruth-Ellen xx
P.S.
Opting into that freebie offer and hoping it solves all your problems is not a sales strategy that comes from a place of fear too. The fear of not knowing enough. Hun, you know loads!
Listening to another generalised webinar, Livestream or group training programme that doesn’t get specific is not a sales strategy.
Obsessing over whether something is wrong with you or something is wrong about your business and then wondering if something is wrong with you again is not a sales strategy.
The difference between a business that thrives and one that dies is being aware of what is going on in your own head. If your head is not in the game then your business will be affected.
When I got divorced, was made homeless with two kids to look after it took me a while to get back to me, the very core of me. Even though I had 20 years worth of experience in sales and had sold millions working with brands I found that I couldn’t sell with confidence, because parts of me were missing in action. Selling with Confidence: How To Win In Sales with Ease is a 6-week intensive program to get you back to your core, so you sell with confidence it starts the 2nd week in June.
You will receive:
? 6 1:1 calls with customised action plans at the end of each session (never walk away not knowing what to do next), which will be focused on a specific result. Every 6th day we will jump back on a call to see how you implemented this action plan. And then we will focus on the next milestone (pay in full and you receive 8 of these)
? Unlimited email access between calls with a service level agreement which means you will get a response from me within 24 hours or less ? Support you want, support you get!
? A private membership area to access your bonuses, ask me questions and practice your sales techniques for actual feedback, yes I know ?
You walk away: –
? Knowing how to sell without looking pushy, sleazy, salesy or all those other things associated with sales
? Knowing how to get new clients with ease (even when you’re sleeping) so it is easy to be sales focused every day without aggressively pursuing sales.
? Knowing how to deliver a compelling vision that will help your soul end clients rush to work with you
? Knowing how to have unshakeable confidence, no matter what, so you start to believe you can create anything you want!
Selling with Confidence is all about knowing your value – understanding how to present it to the world – being unapologetic. The investment is £3997 or four instalments of £1197 each
PLUS,
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4 Day Video Course to acquire sales traits, understand what a sales process really is, gain some methods to actually enable sales to occur without you pulling your hair out. All this will give you the end to end process to move forward with ease and blast through the things that have been keeping you going round in circles (VALUE: £799)
Worksheets, checklists, overcome ANY objection
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Play the part YOU was destined to play ?
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Attention Listeners ? What You Feed Your Mind Affects Your Vibe
“If you don’t pay appropriate attention to what has your attention, it will take more of your attention than it deserves.” ~David Allen
______________________________________________________________________
I literally only listen to positive music ?whether that is from a specific country ? artist to ambient meditation music, I get real picky about what goes on my playlist and only listen to certain Paramore songs. ?
I don’t watch horror movies ? (Paranormal was a comedy btw ?) and keep friends with negative tendencies to a minimum ?(I don’t totally cut them loose because we should encourage and uplift others when we can). God gives us the energy we need to do that.
We should be filling ourselves up with music, movies, books etc that help us stay in that high vibe?. There are some emails I receive from coaches, leaders, trainers etc that use headlines to make me feel bad about my circumstances (well the circumstances they think I am in) as they want me to work with them.
Everybody knows our current circumstances are not an indication of our future circumstances?
In fact, these energy vampires are about to get an unsubscribe notification right now?
Be a leader, an Eagle, Lion ?, Bear? because you’re not a snake? You’re not a sheep!
Do you know who you are?
You’re a force to be reckoned with that is powerful beyond measure? You’re mind-blowing, legendary, splendid, remarkable, you’re words that haven’t even been invented yet
When God made you, he broke the mold because He knew there was never going to be anyone like you again.
It’s time to level up and realise who you are through ALL areas of your life.
What are you paying attention to that is stopping you? Don’t answer that! Just get rid of it?
Ruth-Ellen – Here’s to staying confident consistently?
P.S. Doors to Selling with Confidence is opening soon.
Do you want in?
It’s only £97 to join (then £297 per month)! I want to teach my DRIVEN creators (that’s you by the way!) the mindset AND the strategy of owning it, crushing it and crushing it some more online, and I want to get you in at the trial offer!
For £97!! And with over £3000 of bonus programs! And complete access to the coolest program!
Whatttttt???!
JOIN BY CLICKING THE RELEVANT BUTTON
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PPS Please share this post if you found it helpful or tag someone you know who needs to read this and/or JOIN us!! I’ll send you positive vibes all day for it (truthfully I am sending you positive vibes just for reading this)!